Robert watches over Aaron
by wirshari
Summary: Robert watches over Aaron at the hospital.


**Robert watches over Aaron**

This story deals with a preview of Emmerdale for the week of 18 January 2016, other than that it does not contain spoilers

Robert was getting really tired of hospitals. It seems like he couldn't get away from them. He stretched his legs out a bit, they could buy more comfortable chairs. Aaron mumbled something and then became agitated, He leaned forward, placed his hand on Aaron's arm and said "It's okay, it's me, go back to sleep." Amazingly Aaron calmed down instantly. He waited until Aaron was sleeping peacefully and stood up, he walked around the room a bit, stretching his legs. He wondered what had pushed Aaron over the brink this time. Aaron seemed to have accepted his part in Katie's accident, he and Aaron were no longer together, they had achieved a resentful truce. So what was pushing Aaron to hurt himself again?

Robert sat down again, he had promised himself he was going to change. Since he had survived the shooting he had kept the promise, mostly, he had let out his vengeful side when he confronted Ross. Andy still blamed him for loosing the kids, how was he supposed to know that Debbie would leave the village. The truce between them still held though, they both care deeply for Diane and wanted to make sure she recovered from her cancer. He was still surprised how easily he could think of Andy as a brother, without the rage building up. It had taken a long time to get to this point. It was interesting that getting shot, coming so close to death had brought him peace. Robert had liked Andy when he came to live with them, he was his best friend, however when Andy stayed with Jack he felt pain for some reason as if he had lost something. Seeing Andy with Katie, brought extreme feeling's of jealousy. That jealousy had nearly cost him everything, he left Emmerdale because he could not control his feelings and ended up hurting everyone he cared for.

It was not until that day at the bar where he kissed his first guy on a dare that he realized he liked kissing men. He finally started to understand the urges he felt, were not purely platonic. The first man he had been with had been a one night stand, just someone to figure out what he wanted, it was not until Andrew that he finally understood. Andrew was tall, blond, charming and flirty, they went to the same gym, it was easy for Robert to say yes when Andrew asked him out. They were well matched both ambitious, both had complicated pasts neither wanted to talk about, it seemed as if this might actually work until it happened. They were sleeping when Robert felt Andrew's arm wrap around his waist and pull him closer, Robert mumbled "Andy", and leaned into him. Robert woke up with a start, looking at the man next to him, his sleepy mind still seeing the dark haired stocky man he had dreamed was holding him. It happened a few more times until Robert was scared to sleep, he could not be dreaming of his foster brother. He broke things off with Andrew and went to a bar and picked a woman. He did not dream of Andy that night, so he started dating women. He met Chrissie, beautiful and interesting she was fun and rich, everything he could wish for in a girlfriend. He had not cheated or even looked elsewhere since they started dating, until he came back to Emmerdale. He sometimes regretted coming back, but he looked at Aaron sleeping peacefully in front of him and couldn't imagine not having met him.

Andy had been his downfall, the first encounter with Andy had brought all the feelings back. The frustration that Andy could never be his, the fact that Andy and Katie were together brought back all the jealousy and envy back with a vengeance, the fact that he now knew that the jealousy was pointed at Katie not Andy made it worse. Andy was his brother, foster brother the voice in his head often pointed out, Andy was straight, so were you the voice kept on, Andy loves Katie, you thought the same thing the voice laughed. Then Robert met Aaron, a brainless thug he thought to himself when he saw him with Ross. He liked Aaron, his devil may care attitude along with that sour look gave him a unique charm but it wasn't until Aaron admitted that he was gay that his heart lurched. For the first time since he had met Chrissie he desperately wanted to kiss someone else, whatever the consequences. The first kiss had been too much, he had run away but it was torture leaving Aaron by the side of the road so that night he crawled back, it was their first time together, but definitely not the last his body told him. How could someone like Aaron, who personified everything that Robert was running from, a man, poor and unambitious, be so perfect for him. Aaron was a totally inappropriate risk, Aaron lived in the village he knew everyone. Robert faked indifference and told Aaron it was just physical nothing more, but Robert used his lies to hide what he already knew, he had fallen for Aaron, he loved him. All Aaron had to do was look at him for his heart to calm, as if it had come home.

He had ruined it, like he often did. The fear of having their affair discovered, the constant irritation with Katie, the manipulation of Lawrence, Chrissie and just about everyone made him more reckless. That was when he lost him, the day of his wedding to Chrissie had been painful enough for Aaron added to that the unforgivable deadly fight with Katie had almost killed Aaron. Aaron had nearly killed himself, the guilt he felt in hiding their involvement in Katie's death had made Aaron pull away, it was the final straw between them. Aaron leaving him, telling him it was over for good filled him with the same irrational jealousy, he had had for Andy, the same need to be Aaron's everything and it brought out the monster in Robert. The scared Robert hid in plain site. The well crafted obnoxious happily married man persona hid his true feelings from the world. Robert nearly lost control of his inner monster a few time, nearly killing Chaz, Paddy and the pain he caused Chrissie had led to the helicopter crash. The pain he saw in them was his fault, he destroyed them, he was to blame. The irony was that the only person who could calm him down was Aaron but he hated him now, he had destroyed everything. The constant quiet war he waged against Andy, Aaron, Chrissie, Cain, ... well nearly half the people in the village wanted him dead, should have prepared him for what came next. He barely understood what was happening when he collapsed, he blissfully lost conscious but he could hear weeping, he recognized those sobs, they belonged to Aaron, he wanted to hug them away but then everything calmed and he heard constant buzzing and beeping and muffled voices. He recognized Victoria, Diane and even Andy but the one voice he wanted to hear most was not there, he could not make out what they were saying but they sounded worried.

When he woke from his coma he realized he had done it again, he had pushed and pushed and someone had pushed back. Seeing Andy after the shooting made him realize his heart had finally seen sense. The unrequited impossible love had felt for him that had nearly destroyed everyone he knew was gone. The only thing he felt for Andy was friendship and brotherly love nothing more. Chrissie or Andy were right to hate him, it would have made sense if it was they had shot him but when he went to court seeing the pain, hurt and anger in Aaron it broke his heart. How could he have twisted the one good thing in his life, the one person who accepted the real him, the soul that felt like home into this vengeful man who looked at him with such hate and said he should have died. He had been shaken to the core, if it were not for Ashley's mistake Aaron would have stayed in prison. Andy finally confessed that it was him who had sent a hit man after Robert. Was it wrong of him to be happy, happy that it was Andy not Aaron who shot him. No matter how much Aaron hated him he would not have shot him. Then Aaron was released, he realized it would take a lot more for Aaron to forgive him. Aaron did not trust him, who could blame him, Robert had betrayed him way too often, so he kept his distance.

Just because Aaron wanted nothing to do with him did not mean that Robert did not keep an eye on him, he saw the signs. Aaron was loosing weight, he looked tired and gaunt. Robert had not seen Aaron running, so he was not loosing weight that way. The fact that Chaz and Paddy hated him meant he could ask them for help. Adam was too busy with his own drama, to worry about Aaron's mood so no help there either. Diane told him Gordon was back, he had hoped that would have given Aaron something to be happy about but instead noticed that Aaron was getting worse. So when he went to visit Aaron at the yard on pretense of looking at the books he was concerned at how haggard Aaron looked, he followed Aaron and found he had collapsed. He cradled Aaron in his arms as he called for help, he needed an ambulance and that is how he stayed until help came, holding Aaron, covering him with his jacket. He had followed the ambulance and stayed with Aaron the whole time, Aaron mumbled the whole time, fighting the fever that raked his body. Robert could not make out what Aaron was saying but he looked so lost. So he took his hand, "It's me" he said as the doctors looked on. Aaron calmed down. That was hours ago. Again Aaron became restless and again he took his hand, "It's okay, it's me, go back to sleep, I will keep you safe". He would find out what did this to Aaron and he would not be gentle like he had been with Ross, he would destroy whoever was making Aaron hurt himself like this. He settled back in his chair and looked on as Aaron slept peacefully.


End file.
